camera envy

"Ok, now tilt your head a little to the left, make a fist and bring it up under your chin, and gaze off into the distance. There...that's perfect."

i am a crappy photographer.

there. i said it out loud. but i think the world in general already knew that about me.

for years i didn't even own a camera. i relied on the kindness of family, friends, and the occasional stranger to provide me with photos of my offspring.

i don't know if it's because i didn't want to then SCRAPBOOK said photos, (a fate worse than DEATH) or if i just thought that i would always remember the moments because i had such a spectacular memory and recall of all events in general. (note to self: DON'T do that again. your memory sucks.)

so i've decided to step up my game when my man surprised me with the mother of all mothering day gifts: a nikon d60.

it's similar to the camera that my girl kami has, and her photos are fanFREAKINGtastic. so i hope that just by possessing the camera i will work photography magic.

there are a LOT of numbers, however, and many dials to turn or break or adjust to the wrong setting and a few buttons to push that i think might have been invented by the dharma initiative.

what i'm most excited about? to join the club of "really good moms" at the school play/recital/program who have those ginormous cameras with the fancy straps ordered off of etsy. with what appears to be a scope worthy of the hansen planetarium attached.

while at chandi's school program the other night, i had a small epiphany:the level of your mothering greatness is in direct proportion to the size of the lens attached to your camera.

well now i'm gonna be able to hold my head high come next school year.
my game plan is to walk right in with my largest lens attached and scream,"what NOW, BIZNATCHES?!"

btw: i am already to page 10 of my manual. i feel that i should be ready to open my own photography business within the week. specializing in glamour shots and "concept" photos.

"Now, just imagine you're weightless, in the middle of the ocean, surrounded by tiny little seahorses."


Just SO said...

Awesome camera!!!

Hildie said...

I have this camera. Don't think that owning it will make you a better photographer because I am proof that it's not true. You will have way less blurry photos, I have to admit that.

I have always thought that the moms with big cameras are dorks so I avoid bringing mine to school. But now I know that all the small camera moms are actually jealous.

Tiffany said...

I am dying over here, laughing and gasping for air. You have beautifully captured my experience as a mother with a camera.

I wish we could take a photography class together. We could be teacher's co-pets.

omar said...

Sweet!! I'm a proud Nikon DSLR user myself. If you take a lot of indoor shots, I HIGHLY recommend picking up an SB-400 flash. You may feel like a bit of a dork sometimes adding on a flash to a camera that already has a built-in flash, but you will be SO HAPPY with the results that you won't even care.

Vanessa said...

Can't wait to hear what you will be naming your new photog business.

veronica said...

I just bought this SAME camera! I really like it even though I don't know how to use 99% of the features. (I'm hoping to learn more.) Let me know when you have it all figured out. I'll need a lesson.

And "Glamour Shots by Mindi"...I can't wait!

Anonymous said...

You'll rock it Mindi, you have mad skillz.

Ida said...

I love love love my D50 and it's super long lenses. It super!

tiburon said...

I am jillious.

And I know where you live.

Lethal combination.

Nathan said...

I love that you threw in not one, but two "Pictures by Deb" references.

Laura said...

You make me happy!

"What now, biznatches?!"

Hahahaha! I love it!

kami @ said...

I am so excited to play fotog-er-fer with THE MIND! I think your business should be called words and mothers photography by Mindi, where you can shoot only words and mothers. Think about it. ;)

Melissa said...

OK girlie, I'm a Canon fan myself (only because I know how to do a whoppin' 5 things with mine). I took a night class with a local photographer to learn how to use it (actually I took a Photoshop class first so I could fix how bad I knew my first ones would be!). I take my camera to school functions but never commit to giving people copies when they get developed just in case #1, they suck and #2 they never make it off my hard drive. Have fun!

Suzie said...

This cracked me up. YOU SO FUNNY!

Can't wait to see all those lovely photos.

The RBC is the bomb.

Cole said...

Now my day is made! I am a good mom. BTW- you should see MY lens...I'm a freakin' GREAT mom.

Mia said...

I have been trying to explain this theory to my husband for months now!!! I had him read your post and while he laughed, he was not convinced that I in fact needed the camera. I will keep working on him!

Mrs Anne said...

i have the same one.

i want to sleep with it next to me each night. but alas i'm too concerned about the lenses for that.

it's so fun!!!!

:) can't wait to see all your fantabulous glamour shots!

Omgirl said...

A few years ago I saved up and bought a really fantastic photographers camera. And a couple of huge telephoto lenses. And 1 year later, digital came out. Yes, I have a kick ass camera that takes, no, not regular 35mm film even. It takes Advantix film, what was supposed to be the film of the future. Unfortunately, it never made it big (kind of like laser disks for movies) and I now have a pretty much useless (amazing) camera.