oooooooooohhhh my. can words even adequately express? i think not. what a spectacular example of what NOT to do with your hair. are they brothers? and just who is their crazy (see slang term of the day) gifted stylist? when can i get an appointment?

i think it would be safe to say that they might have this cassette tape in their possession:

do your homework!!

to know me is to know that i love nothing better than to go to a great concert. being a seasoned concert-going vet, i always have one word of advice for people who just got tickets to the next great gig: DO YOUR HOMEWORK!! example: if you just got tickets to see, oh--i don't know........say.....DURAN DURAN, the first order of business is to get their new cd, and wear it out. many people know not what they do and go to said concert expecting to just hear all of the old standbys. note to self: THEY WILL ALWAYS PLAY THE NEW STUFF!!! unless it is a "greatest hits" album, the general reason for a concert tour is to debut the new stuff and have people purchase the music. people who don't do their homework always end up hating half the concert because they are bent out of shape when they leave the hits and hit the new.

i am doing my homework right now with the new "red carpet massacre" album, and i have to say that today is the day that i found the extreme love for it. and i can't believe it took me 8 days to realize that the reason i heart it is that timbaland produced half the tracks--yes, that timbaland. so sue me, but i love a song with a beat that makes me wanna shake it like a polariod picture.

i love "last man standing" and "tempted" and i added "skin divers" to my music--you can find it by scrolling through. (oh, and for most of you, turning your volume up. you know who you are. and what you did.)

alright, today is my favorite vacay destination. which should be easy for me as my la-la-LOVE in life is to do that, but where to choose?

i love any trip that involves a jw marriott--we've loved the ones in scottsdale, las vegas, santa monica, palm springs, and will be loving the one in hawaii on june 4th.

i love any trip with family or friends--cancun and acapulco and park city and california on that list. i'm hoping to add hawaii and palm springs in the next couple years with my peeps.

i love a "rock star" weekend in vegas, which involves staying at a hooked-up hotel like the wynn or red rock or when we stayed in the penthouse suite at the bellagio (mother of all dream hotel rooms! you gotta try that one). i would like to add the salone suite at the wynn and a skyloft (yeah, right--at $25,000 a pop prob. never gonna happen--but it comes with a maybach for the weekend! hello,bargain!) at the mgm grand to that list.

but for sentimental reasons, i am gonna go with sandals at jamaica which is where we spent our honeymoon. we were two 21-year old wide-eyed utah babies but the beaches were beautiful and the resort was awesome. we had a suite that we walked right out of the front door and on to the beach--we were in heaven!

before i punch my time card in this life i would like to go to switzerland, spain, the jw marriott at thailand, and the carribbean again. traveling is spendy, but i've always said that it's the best investment you can make in good times. you can't take it with you, folks! well, you could, but it wouldn't be near as fun as blowing it in this life....

my blogging bff tiburon started this--i invite any of you out there to join in on the festivities!

why i love the spectrum part 3

i just have five words: WHERE CAN I SIGN UP?????

happy weekend

hope that you all have a weekend that is off the hook--as it is nearly 1000 degrees down here in dixie, i will be the cheap white (well, okay--kinda mixed white and brown) labor in our yard. the rbc keeps a mean schedule once spring hits, so i hope i can keep up to avoid punishment.

i would like our back yard to look like this. >>>>>

note to self: do NOT follow latesha.

another reason to love jessie spano

i just know that i would win more friends and influence more people if i had these

mob hit on mia

the superbly-coiffed criminal in the picture above is silvio from the sopranos--he was skulking around my house a few days ago because i am convinced that someone put a hit out on my baby. as you can see from the photos below, someone tried to strangle her with a piece of piano wire.

the day it happened

and the day after
really, she was playing on a chair (translation: standing UP ON TOP OF) next to the window. i told her to jump down because she was messing with the blinds. she jumped and next thing i knew she was crying the "hurt" cry--i comforted her and she didn't say anything until about 30 minutes later when she came in saying she was "bweeding" and she showed me her neck. honestly, it looks like she clotheslined herself, but i think it had something to do with the cord from the blinds. i don't have the old-fashioned kind that they have put warnings out about, but i guess a three-year old will always find the danger hidden in any everyday object. so so scary, though, and i am just grateful that it wasn't worse. i felt really bad, and it looks like it hurts like a mother. i keep thinking someone is gonna call child protective services on me. again. for the 4th time. (not really--i've only been reported twice.)

i did tell russ that it meant that we should take out all our blinds and put in the plantation shutters that i've been wanting forever. he didn't buy it. AT ALL.

motivational posters

i saw a few of these on my blogging friend karisti's site and was infatuated instantly. have you seen them??

everyone loves a southern boy

and a fro hat....(genius!)

this could possibly be my most favorite--too good for words.

sorry bout the naughty word--just concentrate on that sweet tat

if you have seen this post, then you'll know why i heart this one--eshpeshelly for dannielle

poor, poor emo kid

i am devoted to christopher walken

i want to get this one for russ to hang in his office

ya think??

chuck norris is sooooooo gangsta --big ups (see slang term of the day) to him

and finally, my other favoritest one--who makes this stuff up? whoever they are they RULE!!

bathroom break

i used to lifeguard at the st. george city pool--4 summers worth, and you see a little of everything...
this jamie kennedy clip is one of my favorites, as i witnessed this kind of "bathroom break" all together too often.

thankful thursday

things i am thankful for this week:

1. teachers & the public school system--today marks 1 week since abbey's tonsils came out and it is time for that little lady to go back to school. i am SOOOO over her tonsils-- i miss my life. teachers are FO SHO the highest calling--i salute you!

2. my friend joellen who went to cosmetology school. she does the landscape and maintenance on my eyebrows and i think the whole world thanks her.

3. my daughter katie for being our saturday night babysitter. russ and i love, no, NEED, no, HAVE TO HAVE those hours away from all youngsters. katie makes it possible.

4. liquid lortab (2nd week running. see #1)

5. unlimited supply of hot water. since i've gone into my cat-lady phase this past week and don't leave the house, i likey to take a long, wasteful, environmentally-unfriendly shower. like 25 minutes long. is it right? no. do i do it anyway? you know i do!

6. a husband who wants to make me an omelet every morning. love you .

international male, part 2

a new im catalouge dropped the other day and it had a few new items that i am positively and completely in LOVE with:

your mother-in-law will be your biggest fan when you appear wearing the purple haze tuxedo shirt or phillips sweater--both look EVEN better when you open them down to the 4th button.

the sleeveless denim shirt paired with the lace-up leather pant would be ideal for back to school night or parent teacher conference... they oooze confidence and command respect! you won't be suckered into room parent wearing these bad boys....

win friends and influence people in either the kentwood overall or the kentwood gauze overall --everybody loves a man with a bold sense of hillbilly style....

the square neck tank with the beagle shorts, or "manpris" for those hot summer afternoons spent mowing and edging your lawn while looking ghetto-fabulous as you do it. be the envy of all your male neighbor friends.

leather tough guy pants paired with v-neck thermal shirt would be stunning for when you need the ensamble that will be just right for the ward christmas party or scout cake auction dinner--nobody will be bidding against you, tiger!

father's day is coming up this june---do your man a big favor by purchasing him a few items--he'll be thanking you later!


HB to my brother-in-law neal

by day: straightlaced, conservative financial planner. by night: wild, speedo wearing rockstar who secretly wants to be doing this

the doll house

we were driving in a upscale subdivision of retirement homes just around the corner from our house about 6 months ago, when to our utter dismay and total delight, we stumbled on this house. this person has obviously come to the conclusion that the world would be a happier place if everyone just put up a fantastic display of porcelin dolls and kitties and bears. i just love that they are truly committed to this project, so i had to snap a few photos so i could share the wonder and the magic.

jared and jody think THEY found this first, but i know that russ and i were on to this WAY before they even thought of driving by.....we stake our claim!!!

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my favorite flavor: VANILLA

what kind of blogger would i be if i had a blog named "word to your mother" and i didn't pay proper homage to it's mascot?? ahhhhh--vanilla ice. i am a little ashamed to say that here and now, 18 years after this song hit #1, i can STILL quote about 3/4ths of the lyrics--verbatim. yet i struggle to remember the 11th article of faith--can somebody tell me why it works that way? (sigh) both a blessing and a curse.......

i think the picture above preeeeetttty much sums up everything bad about 1990.

i give you..........Robert Matthew Van Winkle. the wanksta (see slang term of the day) formerly known as vanilla ice

the hills--"why kaint i quite chyoo, either?"

my mother is so proud that she has two daughters that watch trashy mtv reality shows (stay strong, loni! the whole family is counting on you!) but i have to post on the hills--do you watch it? oh, i just finished and here are my life-altering thoughts on the whole shebang:

1. don't go out with guys from paris--yes, they are cute in of a dirty, haven't-showered kind of a way, but they smoke. ALOT. and wear really skinny jeans. i'm not in love with that.

2. beware that product placement sometimes just DOES NOT WORK--what the mariah carey??? they tried to shove her down our throats and all they needed to do was bounce her off.

3. spencer+heidi= media whores!! i can't take my eyes off them, but they are seriously delusional! i wish i wasn't so hooked on their patheticness.

saw these pictures yesterday and here is what i believe to be a sample of their schedule on easter sunday:
1. pick out clothing ensembles that subtly coordinate.

2. spencer flatirons heidi's hair.

3. heidi calls us, ok, star, the enquirer and people magazines, drops anonymous hint that she and spencer will be attending an easter-egg hunt for underprivileged children at the park at noon.

4. run into k-mart, pick up tacky pink easter bunny, even tackier bunny ears, and easter basket. and a six pack of miller light. and some hemorrhoid cream.
5. swing by local day-care, arrange to rent 4 year-old female child.

6. arrive at park with "stunned and surprised" look on face when approaching media. graciously agree to "pose" for photographers.

7. ignore pleas for help from 4 year old, all the while whispering "smile...SMILE you little brat." between clenched teeth.

8. pretend to love each other and then pass out KFC to remaining photographers.

if this is not on your tivo, i suggest you get it on and add it to your list of guilty pleasures.